A senseless loss
Her gentle smile
The grace in which she faced her journey
Annemarie with those eyes.

This is difficult
This is complex
This is unfathomable

As the days darken
As the colours change
As the leaves drop
As the losses compile
As the grief compounds
As my heart breaks
As we gather our community
As we stand united as individuals
As we hold hands at the edge of cliff
As we face our vulnerability
As we face our mortality
As we face our personal grief
As we face our communal grief
As we stand together

This is piercing
This is complex
This is unfathomable

United by our tears we continue to build
For Annemaire
With her quiet grace.
For Sarah
With her playful laughter
For Dawn
With her contagious joy
For Sarah
With her love of life

This is hard
This is complex
This is unfathomable

Autumn has brought a tide of loss
Concentrated loss
Complicated loss
Compounding loss
Loss surrounded in duality
Loss that weaves the expected with the unexpected

This is painful
This is complex
This is unfathomable

I am reeling
We are reeling
But still we must continue to build
Our community
This community
It is fundamental
As we hold hands
As we seek comfort in our connections
As we grieve the loss in our connections
As we strive to find kindred spirits for our journey
A gift that will outweigh our grief
A gift that can’t be measured.

This is heartbreaking
This is complex
This is unfathomable

To stand alone is not sustainable
Isolation is not acceptable
Alone but encased by the love of friends and family
Loved ones who will be left behind
When we follow and are followed
Our love remains
Our connections remain
Our community remains

This is vast
This is complex
This is unfathomable

Here I stand
In tears and vulnerable
With my heart open
Entangled in my grief
Holding the hands of my community
In a complicated reality
My heart torn by loss
My heart embracing loss
Accepting the price of my connections
For without them I am alone

This is love
This is complex
This is unfathomable

3 replies »

  1. I just listened to the most beautiful and difficult 6.56 second interview. What you are facing is ……….. I work in the field of home care and have had many a discussion with people who are dying in the early, middle, and advanced stages of death. I am reaching out to you because I wanted to tell you how courageous I think you are. This is a difficult discussion and even sending you this message is taking forever as I must pause and reflect. I am sorry you are dying. L

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